The Word du Jour

WOOO! Go me!!! I got a new job! :D

  I've been thinking for a while that I need to get out of the call centre and working in an office full time would be great for me.  On Tuesday I called up about a job I'd seen on the jobcentre website but the person I was looking for wasn't there so someone took a message and said they would get back to me.  No one did.  That night I was quite annoyed that no one replied until my brother pointed out that things get lost in offices all the time and to call back the next day. 

  So yesterday I called again and the woman asked if I could come in for an interview that day! I went in, started talking and was asked to wait for a second interview from one of the partners in the office I'd be working in.  He was nice and asked me about myself, my family, etc and then he offered me the job, asking me to start on Monday! The same day I called I got the job!  WOO!

I'm so happy right now because it's like I took a year off and didn't do much, with a part-time job, then got a proper full time job in an office which is exactly what I was looking for! 

*does happy dance*

It has been soo long since anything was here...my computer got messed up and kept trying to send error reports when I came on lj but I've cleared a lot of stuff and ran a virus thingy so it seems to be going ok for now...

We got a dog! He's a terrier and the cutest thing I've ever seen! His name is Ziggy (as in Stardust not Big Brother!!!) and he's now 5 months old! He still growls at us sometimes and is extremely attached to my dad but he's currenty sleeping downstairs and when you see him you just think AWW! He's too cute!!!

I watched some Criminal Minds season 2 episodes recently which was fun. I really like that show but it doesn't get nearly enough recognition here in the UK. It can be funny, sad, intense but it's always interesting. I love how they analyze the criminal's mind and can tell that he'll be carrying a journal in his inside, right pocket. That's just cool!

If anyone reads this and gets the joke in the title of this entry then "Woo! You're as crazy as I am!"  :D

I really have to go to bed, I'm getting up early tomorrow to go to the lochs but I'm feeling creative, I want to make something, do something, write something! Yeah! Woo! WTF is wrong with me today? I think I should finish the Life Aquatic Mood Theme I started...yeah, that's what I'll do! 

Bye

I spent some time on this and fingers crossed I wont check back tomorrow to find it all over the place and wonky. I may scream.

Currently I'm pleased with the results. The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou is such a great film! 

My plans have changed already.  Tomorrow I'm going to see TMNT with Heather and Jess!!! YAY!!! It's not really the film I'm excited about (ok a little) but seeing my two best friends.  We don't see enough of each other and it's Heather's birthday soon.   Tomorrow should be fun if I can ever sort out all the details.

Sam! Sam, Sam, Sam! Sammy Boy! Do you never learn? *Sigh* 

Argh, work was a bit rubbish last night. Not as bad as I though it would be but still pretty bad.  I'm not very good at change. 
I'm heading out now to buy a paper and look for jobs which I do realise will be a pretty big change but hopefully the job wont be going from one thing to another constantly!


 

I didn't go to bed afterall, decided to see what I could do with my journal and completely messed it up, lol! I'm too cross-eyed right now to fix it so it will have to stay this way til tomorrow afternoon when I get a chance to fix it...I really should just leave things alone!

Been quite busy over the weekend for once but it was all family stuff. Mum was working on Sunday instead of Saturday this week, I usually stay with her on Saturday night and spend the next day at her house so we went to the picture on Friday night then went to her house. We saw Premonition which was pretty good. I tried to convince her to see TMNT but it's not really her thing (I didn't mind much because I know Heather will go see it with me.)

There were a couple of adverts I thought looked great:

Sunshine: Read about it in Empire and was very interested, even mum said it looked good and she's not usually a fan of those kind of things.
Blades of Glory: OMG! Again it was mentioned in Empire but I didn't expect to see an advert for it. At the start it showed you people spinning around gracefully and mum joked she was going to drag me to it but the second I realized what it was I was like "YES! LETS GO SEE THAT ONE!" I think I gave her a fright lol. It looks too good and it's always the same with these films, I see the advert and really want to see it but then everybody I know goes to see it without me! :-( It's getting ridiculous, I still haven't seen Hot Fuzz and had to put up with Heather and Jess going on about how good it was...still, I love them so it's ok.

Anyway, Premonition was good, not exactly a barrell of laughs but enjoyable.  The ending bothered me a little, I kept thinking of ways it could have been different (the reason I love fanfiction!) and the beginning didn't match up with what happened in the middle...sort of...

On Sunday I ended up at Grans for dinner which was nice but there are still a few grandkids under ten and they scream and run around and generally annoy me quite a bit.  I'm too grumpy to ever have kids!

In other news I hate my job! It's ok money but nobody has any clue what everyone else is doing, it's so unorganized then the supervisors get bitchy when you do something wrong even though everyone gives you different information and generally has no clue. Still it'll do till I find a better one. I'm definitely going to leave college/uni for a few years til I work out what I want to do with my life.

Hmm, I also just watched the trailer for Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End and it looks really good, especially as I was a bit disappointed with Dead Man's Chest.  (Too many recycled jokes about rum and the like and Jack annoyed me by getting away with far too much! I'm a firm believer in karma...although I suppose the end sort of made up for everything he did...) I got into a heated debate about it with Heather and Jess on the train home and Heather accused me of wasting the film for her so I relented and said Jack must have done something very heroic in the two minutes I missed when I went to the toilet.

Although just before Christmas I was helping mum wrap presents and she got my cousin Alessandro Dead Man's Chest and I told her it wasn't anywhere near as good as the first, the look on her face said it all so I quickly back-tracked and said compared to how original and funny Curse of the Black Pearl was.  I wasn't surprised at all to find the DVD among my presents on Christmas day and watching it again was fun it just really wasn't as good as the first.
 
Anyway, I should get to bed. Going to start job hunting tomorrow. I don't know if I'll sleep though, it takes me a good few hours to wind down after work.

 

I sold out to the advertisers for more icon space *hangs head in shame*...oh well!

I finally saw Casino Royale last night. I bought it while I was in town getting my Primeval DVD, I saw it and thought my dad would like it, his face when I gave him it was brilliant. I love giving gifts that people love.

So I got around to watching it last night and wow, it was even better than I expected.  I now want to be a free runner but I'm too scared to even try it, lol. The titles were so different to all the other bond films, they seem to have ditched the Tales of the Unexpected style dancers in favour of men hitting each other and instead of women in bikinis emerging from the water it's topless Bond...this is not a complaint! I can't get over how cool this film is, I normally get bored of action scenes that go on and on but the chase at the start of the film kept getting better and better although I could hardly watch the scene's on the scaffolding (I scared myself on the monorail in Blackpool).  It's like those adverts with tennis players running around the rooftops going far too near the edge *shudders* I think that's another thing that'll put an end to my career as a free runner before it has even begun.

Watching Primeval for the hundredth time I noticed something... *spoilers for last episode* 

When Claudia came out of the toilet and looked in the mirror everyone was like

"OMG Claudia's an anomaly!"

but I was more like

"OMG Claudia didn't wash her hands!"

lol, I also have a crappy theory that's basically Claudia looked like an anomaly in the mirror and after she disappeared the anomaly looked like it was pulsating and growing...think about it.

Anyway, that's about all I have to say for now.

I think if anyone reads this they should ignore the little outburst below, I wasn't feeling my best. Now I'm employed, happy and have money YAY! 

Although after weeks of slagging off Primeval and loving the last two episodes I decided just to take the plunge and but the DVD and give the first few episodes a chance without comparing it to Doctor Who.  I'm so glad I did because now I love it and it has given me yet another ship! I'm so for Nick/Claudia happening and think Helen is a selfish bitch! I mean she plays around while married to Nick, disappears for eight years without so much as a postcard to say "Hi, I'm alive" then comes back and gets all moody because Nick and Claudia kiss.  Argh, her character infuriates me but that just makes me all the more certain that Nick will never go back to her, instead he will find Claudia and confess his love to her...right? All my ships usually never happen or take forever to get there then break up (damn Carby breaking my heart like that) and i have sworn that I will never ship for Doctor Who again because it only ends in tears.

Anyway, for a show I started out hating I'm certainly loving it now!

  The realisation of what a fucking disappointment to my family I am has come as quite a surprise (which goes to show how thick I am!).  I’ve been thinking of changing my name and running away to be a lazy drain on society some place else and then at least my family can say: “Oh Karen? She finally got a job and had to move to Switzerland, probably wont here from her again. Oh well, more tea?”

  When your family start to really criticize you, you know you’ve fucked up big time so when I told my dad about how I got a letter saying if a company doesn’t get back to me in a few weeks I was unsuccessful and his reply was that I should give up and go to college my thoughts changed from running away to grabbing some pills and turning on Coldplay. Fuck!
  Christmas is only making it worse, people are buying me presents! They ask what I want and give me money to help me out and smile and tell me it’ll all get better when I just want to scream at them to stop being so stupid. I’ve been a lazy, no user my whole life so why would I change now?

  Why I deserve to live I don’t know but I’m fucking terrified of dieing and don’t really plan on doing so any time soon but sometimes I can’t help thinking about what a horrible bitch I am. I’ve got all these nice things and I hate my life. I can’t even look someone in the eyes when I talk to them. I have to think before answering the question “what’s your name?”. I have a fear of being shouted at: all through school, my home life, even sitting in my aunt’s kitchen helping her make labels I’ve been terrified that they’ll yell at me and tell me to take off my shoe and throw it on the floor in front of everyone (I have issues!).

  I always take these things personally.  Every rejection is like getting slapped in the face, every time I never hear anything is like getting punched in the stomach and every time (the one time) I get an interview it’s like someone teasing me, knowing I’ll get my hopes up no matter how hard I try not to then beating the shit out of me for the fun of it.

  Then once I get a job (ha ha ha) what happens? Nothing. I slave away for god knows how many years it’s gonna be until I keel over and two people come to my cheap funeral (and one of them thinks I’m Wilma Gardener).  Nothing. I don’t even have an afterlife to believe in. We make up these stories to amuse ourselves, to make ourselves feel better, to scare little children into behaving…there might be a heaven (;)) there might not be, either way I’m fucked so why I care is beyond me but I do. For some strange reason I’m sitting in the middle of an existential angst that I don’t understand and it feels like I see the world clearer than everyone else because they seem to think we’re here for a reason and I think we evolved from apes and got too big for our own boots deciding that we’ll kill every other living thing on this planet or die trying.

  I don’t try and save the environment or the Whale or Pandas because I expect other people to do it and that’s my problem. The main reason I don’t have job is me. If I really, really, really, really wanted a job I would have one by now but for months I sat and twiddled my thumbs expecting them to come to me and now that I’m actually trying I still look bad because everyone thinks I’m still messing around and not really trying. I see it when they look at me, they think I’m a waste of space and when people I love start to resent me it hurts but it hurts even more because I know I deserve it! I got special treatment for so long and now that it’s coming to an end I feel like if I don’t get a job soon I might seriously be on my way to live with my mum…and I wouldn’t even blame them although I would be surprised if she took me in with open arms. 

  I used to think it would be so easy. Going to school, making friends, getting good marks, getting a job but it’s not and it wasn’t. I hated every second of school when I was reminded of how alone I was in classes,  how little I understood the work, how much I feared the teachers and the humiliation of being told off in front of everyone, how awkward and clumsy I was, how fat I was compared to all the other girls, how ugly, miserable and down right annoying everyone seemed to find me and how I always looked bad no matter if I tried or not so I stopped trying.  I care about what people think so much that I’m scared to make an effort, I feel more self conscious going out in “nice” clothes that old tatty ones, I can’t wear make-up or look at myself in a mirror in public because I can imagine what people think: “Give it up your never going to be good looking.” “Heading for the circus are we?” “No amount of staring will change the fact that you’re a dog.” etc
I told you I have issues.

Personal ad reads: Must Love Dogs

Man: “Must love dogs, eh? Do you have a lot of pets?”
Woman: “None.”
Man: ???...(realisation dawns on him)
Man has left the conversation

I've decided to try and learn a few HTML tricks because I see people do cool things all the time and I can't work it out. *sigh* I've learned how to link using a picture! Woo!

/\ A shameless promotion but who cares? I'm proud of myself now. :D